Five Minutes

Okay, so I have five minutes..literally to get you caught up on what's going on in my life.

Soooo, Tuesday night I was sitting in my hospital bed eating dinner when I began to have a dull back-ache and menstrual-like cramps. I thought that it didn't seem to be normal so I called my nurse who connected me with the fetal monitor. She came back within 15 minutes and told me that I was in fact having contractions three minutes apart. I called Aaron, who was at home assembling my glider for the nursery. He asked me what he should do. I told him that my guess was that he get his ass to the hospital quick, fast, and in a hurry because I was being taken to labor and delivery and I doubted that anyone would wait for him in the event that I needed a C-section. He got there in about 20 minutes, which is pretty fast considering the distance.

After I arrived in L&D the doctor checked my cervix and told me that I was dilated to 1 cm. That's not much so I was hoping that the contractions would stop and Hannah could continue growing inside for a little longer. She came back in an hour and I was dilated to 3 cm. I started crying because that meant that I was in fact in labor and was going to have a baby that day! I didn't get to take any of my birthing classes, and wasn't really sure what to expect, other than what Hollywood shows us in movies. The doctor asked if I was interested in getting an epidural, before she could get the sentence out of her mouth, I was like yes, please! And I've heard all kinda of bad stories about people "missing their window" and not getting one, so I wanted it as soon as possible. I got it within a half hour and spent the rest of the night with my friends coming and going and watching the monitor and saying how the contractions looked really bad on there and that they probably hurt like hell, but I couldn't feel anything from the waist down! I took a few naps here and there so I would be a little rested and a little before 0500 the nurse told me that I had finally dilated to 10 cm and that she was going to get the doctor. After the doctor got there she explained that when I felt a contraction (I could feel the pressure but no pain) I needed to push and hold it for as long as possible. I knew that my baby was small, so it shouldn't take more that a few pushes right? WRONG. I pushed for an hour. It was exhausting. I pushed so hard at the end that my eye sight became blurry. I do not know how people have normal sized babies. It was hard!

But at 0658 Hannah Erin Billings came into the world. And the moment I heard her cry I began to cry and they handed me my tiny little girl and I felt a love that I could've never imagined. It is a moment that I cannot describe. I got to see her for a brief moment and she was taken to the NICU where she will stay until she is able to come home, probably sometime in October. She's a fighter though, every day she gets stronger and she is able to breathe on her own. She is very active and alert. It's absolutely amazing to me.