Worst Week EVER

So this week has sucked ass in a major way! Let me give you the run down on why I hate life this week....

1. Hilary left..'nuff said.
2. It took me three hours to drive back from Denver in snow and rush-hour traffic.
3. Got a speeding ticket less than five miles from my house.
4. One of my dogs has diarhea, and it's too cold to leave her outside so I have had to clean up multiple messes. The other one is limping and I think she is depressed. And the third one never knows what the hell is going on.
5. I think my baby has colic.
6. My friend passed away from cancer.
7. There is a rumor that Aaron might get extended.

I am so ready for this week to be over, and I hope next week is way more positive!

There really aren't words....

I just don't understand why life is so unfair. I found out yesterday that a friend of mine passed away on Thanksgiving. She was 16 and developed cancer a little over a year ago. She had her whole life ahead of her, but it was stolen. She never experienced a prom, graduation, wedding, or being a mother....I don't even know if she ever experienced love or a first kiss. These are all the things most little girls day-dream about, but her time ran out before she was old enough to really live her life. She was such a sweet, wonderful, fun girl. I used to visit her when she was sick and we would go to a movie on a good day, or play Guitar Hero (she was so much better than me!). She had told me that her cancer was in remission, and that's the last I heard. I had no idea that it had come back and spread to most of her major organs. I hadn't been to visit her since Hannah's birth, and I truly regret that. She was so excited about me having a baby girl, and she never got to meet her. She was a wonderful person, and she will be missed. Rest in peace dear, sweet Lindsey.

I love this girl!

I just want everyone to know how much I love and adore my bff, Hilary! We've known each other since middle school and became really close while "working" at Wendy's...I really think we did more bull-shitting than working, but whatever. We lived together one summer while we were in college, we attended each others weddings (which were two days apart), and she has traveled many many miles to be with me and support me in Aaron's absence. She is just one of those friends that you only come across once in a lifetime. A true friend that is there through thick and thin, and can always make you smile. She has a song for every daily event and can cook like nobody's business (btw...I really want some of that apple pie!). She is truely caring, but won't hesitate to put someone in their place!

I chose to make her Hannah's Godmother because she is all of this to me and so much more. We have a million memories and inside jokes, and I hope we continue to make many more through the years. I can't wait to see what new adventures we encounter! She is my best friend, and I love her!

Boop Boop

We did it! We finished our first 5K! Some of it was up-hill, which totally sucked! But we both pushed through and finished together!

Christmastime

I am SO looking forward to putting up my Christmas tree! I am in the Christmas spirit in a big way...probably because it has already snowed a few times and snow reminds me of Christmas. This will be the first year that I haven't put up my tree with Aaron since we have lived together. That makes me sad. I miss him.

One of those days...

Let me start by saying that I got NO sleep last night! Hannah got a shot yesterday and it made her super cranky. She was up alllllll night! She finally went to sleep at about seven o'clock and allowed me to sleep til almost noon (thank God!).

Then I was making dinner and the oven caught on fire! Nothing big, but still....you know it's always something.

And someone needs to tell Curt Leonhardt that he needs some manners. I missed a call from this person, so I called the number back; just in case it was important. Whomever answered giggled, said something I couldn't understand, and then hung up on me! So, I called the number back and no one answered. Naturally, I left a nasty message on their voicemail and told them to quit being a bitch.

I hope nothing else strange happens to me today, and I hope that I get a reasonable amount of sleep tonight!

P.S. I haven't gotten many responses on my Bows post. I need advice on the naming of my bowtique so I can get it up and running! Your opinions would be greatly appreciated!

Getting close

The Turkey Trot is next Saturday....as in six days from today. I ran this afternoon and my Nike+ said I ran 3.02 miles. If you would've asked me if I could run that far a few months ago, I would've said no. I bought a jogging stroller so I can keep up with this running when Hil goes back and I no longer have a live-in babysitter.

We are also getting close to Aaron coming home....less than 90 days! Ahhhh! I can't believe it! And I have so much planned for the next few months that I know time will fly by (thankfully). He called yesterday morning and Han was awake so I let him hear her making her little squeaky baby noises. He told me that he had received the pictures of her that I sent, and I asked him if he thought she had changed much. When he answered he started crying. Oh my God it broke my heart! I have only heard that man cry three times. But it also makes me happy to know that he loves her so much. What a wonderful husband and daddy he is! I am so thankful that I have stuck by him during the bad times, as he has me. I couldn't imagine my life without him. This is exactly where I want to be.

Bows

One of my favorite things about having a little girl is being able to put bows on her! The bigger the better! So, I have been making bows to match her outfits, and I have decided to open an online boutique and make custom bows that people can order. Hilary and I brainstormed about what the name of my 'bowtique' should be and we came up with The Pink Banana Bowtique. Pink cause it's my favorite color and Banana because that is often what we call Hannah. So, I googled it to see if there is another business with that name. There is.....and it's an adult bookstore! But I think that the name is soooo cute and I still want to use it, even though it's a conflict of interest. So, should I use it anyway, or think of something else. Anyone have a suggestion?

Here are some of the bows that I have made:

pictures

Is anyone else having problems uploading pictures to their blog? If you know what the problem is or how to fix it, please let me know! I have pictures that I want to share!

He loves me, he loves me not....

He loves me!!!!! I recieved these beautiful flowers from the hubs yesterday

Awwww, isn't he sweet! But the best part was was the card, which reads, "Love you tons. I can't wait to come home to my two girls!! Love, Aaron." And it was for no reason at all, just because he loves me so much! How did I get so lucky?!

Stalkers

Apparently I am pretty popular to crazy-ass people in 2009. I have not only one stalker, but two.

This guy that I dated briefly while I was in the Navy has tried to friend me on every social networking site known to man. I block him, and then he makes a new account just to send me another request! Get the hint psycho! I don't want to be your effing friend!

So for all of my stalkers, current and future, this card is for you (I would send it but I don't want to waste the $2 on a creeper).

Courtesy of Etsy.

97ish days

Wow! I guess since Hannah has come home, time has really snuck up on me. In less than 100 days Aaron will be home! I just cannot believe that this year has gone by so fast and the deployment is almost over! Now I just hope that he doesn't get extended like last time. I seriously doubt it, but it is the army we are talking about here.

Unwanted

I have had some unwanted visitors on my page. So, since people cannot mind their own business I guess I have no choice but to make my blog private.

If you would like to continue to have access to my page (and why wouldn't you, because I'm freaking hilarious) please send me your email address.

Thank you and have a good day....except you (and you know who you are), I hate you and you need to go away!

100

Questions:

How does it feel having her home?
Amazing! Having to visit your daughter in the hospital blows. I feel more like a Mom now. It's great.

Do you get overwhelmed taking care of her on your own?
Not yet. Hilary has been helping. I am just tired. REALLY tired. I think if I were working I would be a lot more stressed.

How did you two decide when to have children or is Hannah just a surprise blessing?
I got pregnant in 2007 (not really by accident, but not really on purpose either). We lost that baby, and then decided that we really wanted one. So we "tried" for almost a year and then conceived her right before he left for deployment. She is a blessing that happened on purpose. : )

What is one thing you like about deployment (yes I know that may sound strange...)?
I guess I would have to say that the best benefit is the money. We paid off a lot of debt this year, if we hadn't done that I wouldn't be able to be a stay-at-home-mommy.

If you could be on a reality show, which would it be and why?
The Simple Life. Those girls look like they had fun.

What would you do if Coach didn't exist? Cry? :( that would be a sad, sad day.
Yes, it would. I would probably have some other favorite type of bag. Maybe Louis Vuitton.

Other than a trophy-wife, (lol) if you could be anything, what would you be and why?
Probably a model. Not that I am anywhere nearly as thin as they are. But I guess if we are dreaming, I would have a perfect body and eat the perfect diet and get some boobs, so then I could be one. I'm not sure why, I just always wanted to do that.

What was your favorite part of the navy?
The respect. When you tell people that you are an active duty female, they treat you differently. And I know Aaron was always proud of me for doing it. I miss that.

What's the best job you've ever had?
Not the type that pays in cash. Army wife and mom. Defiantly the most rewarding.

What was your favorite part of growing up in Franklin?
Being able to leave and not looking back. Lol. Probably starting kindergarten with the same people we graduated with, not many people can say that. What was yours?

What was the best part of high school?
Co-op. And us eating lunch at Wendy's/Sonic/McDonald's. That was my favorite. Funny that those are still the same places we eat lunch.

Love

This little girl stole my heart.

My next post will be my 100th...so for the sake of traditions, ask any and all the questions you want!

Finally!

Hannah came home yesterday!

I now get to enjoy being a sleep-deprived Mommy. Someone once told me that the last good nigh of sleep I got was the night I conceived, I think they were right! I stayed over night with her last night so the nurses could make sure that I am capable of caring for her. I got one hour of sleep, literally. I'm so worried about her reflux and breathing. Maybe tonight I will be able to relax a little more. I hope, anyway!

Lucky

I just need to brag a little. I have a beautiful baby girl, who I was blessed to meet two months earlier than expected, wonderful friends who support me and love me to no end, and a husband who loves and adores me even more with each passing day. My life is more complete than ever before, and I couldn't ask for anything more from life right now.

Running

So, as some of you may know because you follow Hilary's blog we have been doing the program "From couch to 5K." Today is day 5 for us. We both bought new running shoes and are dedicated to it because we want to run the Turkey Trot at Ft Carson in November. I am determined to get my pre-pregnancy body back and secretly I want to be able to out run my husband when he gets back from deployment. He is always giving me a hard time for not being able to "PT" like I did when I was in the Navy. I am a very competitive person, and just wanting to be better than him is enough motivation for me!

Hilary said...

"Pssssh, mother-fuckin brrrrrr man!"

Hahaha, it was so funny! And she was right because it snowed and is like 20 degrees outside. It went from summer to winter and completely missed fall! Boooo fall is my favorite season!

Time to break out the scarf and gloves.

Laundry

Yesterday Hilary and I did laundry. It consisted of tee shirts, hoodies, and sweat pants. We don't care if we look good these days, because frankly we don't have anyone to look good for. And we like to be comfortable. End of story.

Get you own stuff

My husband has this habit of "borrowing" my stuff. I thought the definition of "borrowing" was to ask to use someones belongings and then return them in a reasonable amount of time. His definition of borrowing is taking my stuff and doing whatever he pleases with it. Sometimes I get it back, sometimes I don't. It's really more like stealing if you ask me.

One good example is my IPOD. Before he got his own he would take mine when he went to the gym or for a run, so therefore he would sync it with his songs (we don't like the same type of music). He renamed my IPOD Billinz Shit. Okay that's all fine and good, except that I don't know how to change it, and it isn't his shit, it's mine.

Anyway, he eventually got his own IPOD. Some how or another the dog got ahold of the cord you use to charge and upload it. She chewed up the corner, but it still works most of the time. When he left for deployment he somehow managed to get my cord and leave me with the jacked up one. Um, excuse me, I didn't leave mine out to get chewed on!

So my point is, quit "borrowing" my stuff cause when I want to use it I can't ever find it!

My Baby Girl

Is growing so fast! She is already five weeks old and weighs five pounds, one ounce. I can't believe how fast time is already going. I'm sure the next 17 years and 11 months will fly by too.

Still no word on when she gets to leave the hospital, but I hope it's soon. I can't wait to have her home.

Here are some new pictures of Hannah that Hilary took with her new camera.

Friends

I love seeing old friends, and I currently have two of them visiting me right now! Hilary flew into Denver Airport Saturday night, and she is staying here with me to keep me company and help with Hannah when she comes home. Monday my friend Kelly came to see me. We were stationed together in the Navy and I haven't seen her in almost four years! So, we've all been hanging out, as well as Kelly's son Logan. It kinda feels like we're single again, living in a dorm/barracks. It's been tons of fun and I really enjoy catching up with both of my wonderful friends!

Kelly and me

The best things in my life

So I suppose I should give an update to my life, other than the bull-shit drama.

Aaron left Monday (while this is not a good thing, he is one of the best parts of my life...just to clarify). It was the hardest goodbye that we have ever had. Even more so than when I had only been Mrs. Billings for a month and he was going away for the first time, and we had no idea what to expect from a deployment, or when I had found out less than 24 hours previously that we were going to have a baby. I think the reason for this is because while he was home we bonded. We became parents, who's number one concern is now their child. And no one else in the whole world feels about Hannah the way we do. It's like some sort of connection that we can only have with each other. And I love him differently too. Like as in he's the father of my child soft-of way. He gave me this gift, my perfect little Hannah, that no one else could have ever given me. Don't get me wrong, I am still in love with his as my husband, but seeing him in this different role made me fall in love with him all over again. Seeing the look on his face when he holds his baby girl, and knowing that he also has her best interest in mind -- just like me. And after everything that we went through, with the pre-term labor and him coming home on emergency leave and him seeing his daughter be born. Plus the whole NICU thing. I just don't know how I would've handled all that without him here. When the doctor told me that I was in fact in labor I started crying; I was scared. I didn't know what to expect or how healthy my baby would be. And while the doctor was talking to me, prepping me for what was about to happen, Aaron reached over and grabbed my hand, as if to say, "It's okay, no matter what happens, I am here; and I will always be here." And that small act reassured me and I was ready to move on with the delivery. And when we were saying our goodbyes I also felt sad because I felt sorry for him. He is having to leave the two people who he loves most in this world to go back to a place that he hates. And miss the first five moths of his child's life. No pictures or videos can replace him not being here. No matter how hard I try to capture every moment in her life, it's still not the same. He can't hug her or kiss her. He can't feed her her bottle. He can't put her to bed at night. It just breaks my heart to think of what he's going through. Honestly, I don't know if I would ever be able to do that. He is a much stronger person than me. So, yes I miss him, I miss his presence and lying next to him at night...all the little things. But, his love is worth the wait.

The other best thing in my life is, of course, little miss Hannah. Not much has changed with her situation, other than she was moved to another room in the NICU. This was done for staffing purposes, and making sure that the nurses don't get too loaded down with more babies than they can handle. Her room now has a view! I do have to say that so far, I don't like this pod as well as I did the other one. The nurses just don't seem as friendly. I already had to complain because one of them gave me attitude (after the terrible day I had Monday with Aaron leaving and the stupid bitch trying to sabatoge my life I just was NOT in the mood). We are working on breast-feeding, and that seems to be coming along okay. She latches on and sucks, but it is still a lot of work for her, so we just have to keep practicing every day. All I know is that I cannot wait to bring her home. It will be great to be here with her and do our own thing without the nurses breathing down my neck. She weighs over four pounds now, and she is starting to fill-out and not look so skinny. No word yet on when she might come home, but I don't think it will be more than a couple of weeks. I will be sure to keep you posted.

Obsessed

In reference to the previous blog that I posted:

Stop stalking my blog! Since you no longer want to be my friend (nor do I want to be yours) stop reading things about my life. The fact that you care enough to go to my blog multiple times a day and read what people are saying about you proves even more that you are guilty. I see everyone who visits my page and how often they visit it, so GO AWAY!

I'm still in shock

Yesterday something horrible happened. Someone that I used to be friends with tried to destroy my marriage and my friendship with my best friend all in one blow. I don't feel like going into the details of this matter. This is not the first time that she has betrayed me either.

All I have to say is that, in order to hurt me, you must be smarter than me. And she is not. She is an evil person, not capable of having feelings or compassion. Or a conscience for that matter.

You are a heartless person. May God have mercy on your soul, and may he also protect you if we ever cross paths again.

woohoo

So Hannah got to move out of her incubator yesterday! Now all she has to do is wake up for all of her feedings and be able to finish her entire bottle - which she did once for me yesterday. I bet she'll be home in two, maybe three weeks. Too bad Daddy won't be here at that time.

moving right along

Tonight I got to feed my baby girl for the first time! This is a HUGE step for little miss Hannah, it's one step closer to coming home. She ate a little over half of her feeding, which is really good for the first time. Tomorrow we might get to try nursing. It's the little things that make life great!

Prissy Pants

I can say that my daughter gets her demanding attitude honestly...from me! I was holding her and all of a sudden she threw a FIT! Her diaper had been changed, so it wasn't that. She wasn't in some weired position, so I knew she was comfortable. I re swaddled her so she could feel secure. She was screaming, arms flailing!!! Finally I stuck her binki in her mouth. ***Ding ding ding, we have a winner! All that for a pacifier!

Whew, I have my work cut out for me!!!

This picture was taken when she was one day old, just so you can see just how small 3 lbs 1 oz is.

rub-a-dub-dub

Hannah's in the tub!

I got to give her a real bath (apposed to sponge baths) for the first time tonight! She wasn't really a fan of being wet...

All clean and ready for bed!

THE best news!

So I was talking with Hannah's nurse yesterday, and she told me that Hannah could be coming home in as little as three weeks! It all depends on how well she does with eatting from a bottle/breast. She has to be able to eat and gain weight...some babies born early have a hard time with it because sucking can be exhausting for them, so they don't eat enough to gain weight. So lets hope she does well with it and is able to come home sooner rather than later (at the most it will be six weeks).

Hannah wearing clothes for the first time.

bow-chica-wow-wow!!!

As you know, my husband has been deployed for the past six months (and some change...but who's counting??). Now he's home on R&R so naturally we want to be intimate after half a year of abstinence. And since I just had a baby, it isn't quite what it used to be...as in I feel like we're in high school because it can't go much further than "heavy petting," so to speak. So, we decided that we are going to try to take it to the next level before he goes back for five more months. I feel up to it, so why not? But since I don't want any more babies any time soon, and I haven't seen the doctor about contraceptives yet, we bought condoms. This is not something that I thought I would be doing for the rest of my life, since I am married, and don't really care for them anyway. And Aaron and I have never used them since we have been together. So anyway we go to Walgreen's today and I was like, okay...go get them. He refused. Seriously?! He is 25 years old, and too embarrassed to buy condoms! That just cracks me up, which is why I chose to share this story. So I bought them, something that I have not done in nearly a decade. There are so many different types, and they are expensive! Haha, I hope that is the last time I venture down the condom aisle.

NICU day 13

Hannah is doing good. She has gained two ounces, and now weighs 3.3 lbs. She did have the oxygen taken out for about a week, but had to have it put back in today. The doctor said it's normal for preemies to have it, especially with the altitude here. She is having a little bit of reflux and pukes up her food sometimes, which is also normal for preemies because their stomach muscles don't work as well as full-term babies. Hopefully that will improve and we can start to bottle feed her in another week. Right now she has a feeding tube, because preemies don't have the ability to suck, swallow, and breathe all at the same time. Overall she is doing good though and everyone seems to think she will be able to come home before her due date. I hope so, I can't wait to have her here and be able to hold her all the time. I miss her so much when I am away from the hospital.

She ain't what she used to be

Giving birth is the most amazing thing ever. After all you are bringing another life, that you created, into this world. It's pretty cool. And I would go through it all over again, just to see that beautiful face looking up at me.

There are some things about it which suck though, in no particular order....

Such as:

1. An episiotomy...and the stitches that follow.
2. The seven extra pounds I acquired.
3. That one purple stretch mark on my creamy white belly.
4. Hemorrhoids.
5. No sex for six additional weeks (added to the six months of abstinence that I have already endured, and the five months that are to follow once the hubs goes back to Afghan).

Needless to say, between the stitches and hemorrhoids, sitting isn't as much fun as it used to be.

I love...

My husband and baby girl. I love that Aaron is home and he was able to be present for the birth of our daughter. I love being with them, and nothing in the world makes me happier. I love that Aaron is a really good Daddy, and you can see how much he loves Hannah by the look on his face when he is with her. I am seriously in love with my life right now, the only things that could really make it perfect would be Hannah coming home from the hospital and Aaron not leaving for Afghistan again. Other than that, life is great, and I love it!!!!

Five Minutes

Okay, so I have five minutes..literally to get you caught up on what's going on in my life.

Soooo, Tuesday night I was sitting in my hospital bed eating dinner when I began to have a dull back-ache and menstrual-like cramps. I thought that it didn't seem to be normal so I called my nurse who connected me with the fetal monitor. She came back within 15 minutes and told me that I was in fact having contractions three minutes apart. I called Aaron, who was at home assembling my glider for the nursery. He asked me what he should do. I told him that my guess was that he get his ass to the hospital quick, fast, and in a hurry because I was being taken to labor and delivery and I doubted that anyone would wait for him in the event that I needed a C-section. He got there in about 20 minutes, which is pretty fast considering the distance.

After I arrived in L&D the doctor checked my cervix and told me that I was dilated to 1 cm. That's not much so I was hoping that the contractions would stop and Hannah could continue growing inside for a little longer. She came back in an hour and I was dilated to 3 cm. I started crying because that meant that I was in fact in labor and was going to have a baby that day! I didn't get to take any of my birthing classes, and wasn't really sure what to expect, other than what Hollywood shows us in movies. The doctor asked if I was interested in getting an epidural, before she could get the sentence out of her mouth, I was like yes, please! And I've heard all kinda of bad stories about people "missing their window" and not getting one, so I wanted it as soon as possible. I got it within a half hour and spent the rest of the night with my friends coming and going and watching the monitor and saying how the contractions looked really bad on there and that they probably hurt like hell, but I couldn't feel anything from the waist down! I took a few naps here and there so I would be a little rested and a little before 0500 the nurse told me that I had finally dilated to 10 cm and that she was going to get the doctor. After the doctor got there she explained that when I felt a contraction (I could feel the pressure but no pain) I needed to push and hold it for as long as possible. I knew that my baby was small, so it shouldn't take more that a few pushes right? WRONG. I pushed for an hour. It was exhausting. I pushed so hard at the end that my eye sight became blurry. I do not know how people have normal sized babies. It was hard!

But at 0658 Hannah Erin Billings came into the world. And the moment I heard her cry I began to cry and they handed me my tiny little girl and I felt a love that I could've never imagined. It is a moment that I cannot describe. I got to see her for a brief moment and she was taken to the NICU where she will stay until she is able to come home, probably sometime in October. She's a fighter though, every day she gets stronger and she is able to breathe on her own. She is very active and alert. It's absolutely amazing to me.

I haven't forgotten

I'm sorry that it has taken me so long to write my blog about Hannah's birth, and that I haven't been keeping up with everyone else very well! I am so busy running back and forth to the hospital and trying to spend as much time with Aaron as I can before he has to leave again. Life is crazy right now, but I will get to it soon!

Operation: Healthy Baby...Mission Accomplished!

She's here!!!!!!!

After 13 hours of labor my baby girl arrived at 0658 weighing 3 lbs and 1 oz, 15.75 inches long! I will post another blog with all of the details soon, but right now I am super busy and super tired....and of course I'll post pics!

Operation: Healthy Baby, Day 8

Stillllllllllll nothing new. The doctor said that Hannah weighs 2 lbs 15 oz right now, which is a little small. They are going to check her growth in a few days to make sure that she's still putting on weight, and if not they may have to induce sooner than expected.

So Aaron went home yesterday to shower and let the dogs out and he came back wearing a sweater! Bahahaha! I was like, you do know it's August, right? I guess it is several degrees cooler here than Afghanistan and I keep my room a comfy 68 degrees! Everyone who comes in says its cold but I feel comfortable! I'm baking a bun so it makes my body temperature higher. But I thought it was hilarious!

Operation: Healthy Baby, Day7

So, Aaron got here last night! It's almost unreal to see him! He had been traveling for four days and hadn't slept since he left. After we ate dinner, he crashed. Literally, one minute after his head hit the pillow I said his name and he didn't answer. He must've been exhausted.



But nothing else has changed. No baby yet. Tomorrow I hope to go on a tour of labor and delivery and talk to a nurse because I didn't have a chance to take my birthing classes yet. Hopefully that will make me feel a little more prepared.

Day 6 continued

Aaron's here!!!!! Well, he's not here here but he's in Colorado Springs! One of my friends picked him up from the airport and he will be here shortly!!!!! Ahhh! It seems unreal, I can't wait to kiss him and look at him and hug him! It's great!

Operation: Healthy Baby, Day 6

Nothing new. Which is good. I had a contraction when I was on the monitor last night, but I didn't feel it. And one in an hour is good. No baby coming yet! Which is good, because she needs to wait for Daddy, who still hasn't called and still isn't here. I just expect him to walk through that door any moment.

I have had lots of visitors, which has been keeping my occupied. It's so nice to have so many friends who care. I don't know what I would do without them. And Maggie got to visit too! They have pet visitation for pets over one year who are up-to-date on their shots and groomed. They have to be on a leash and supervised by whomever brings them. Sam brought Maggie to see me and she curled right up with me. I hope she gets to come back, because I miss my puggy wuggy!!!

Operation Healthy Baby: Day 5

Update on Hannah: Nothing has changed, she is still intact and I am not having contractions. I can't feel her movement as well due to the lack of fluid, but according to the monitor she is moving around just fine. We are at 30 weeks and 4 days, and hoping to make it until 34 weeks.

Update on Aaron: No word from him yesterday or today so far. One of his soldiers (who is home for leave) and his wife came to visit last night. I told him what Aaron has said to me during our last conversation about his whereabouts, etc. Williams told me that he probably got put on a flight and didn't have time to call, and he suspects that he is somewhere over the ocean. I hope that he's right! The waiting and the unknown are killing me! I am so anxious for him to get here just in case I do go into labor. And of course seeing his face won't be so bad either lol.

My stay in the hospital has been pleasant so far. All the nurses are really nice, I have Wifi in my room and cable. AND I get room service, so the dining experience has been great! I pretty much have visitors from noon on every day. I have so many supportive friends that have really been there for me, I am blessed!

Operation: Healthy Baby, day 3

Update on Hannah: Still no contractions! We are all hoping that she stays in for another four weeks. No signs of infection. Her heartbeat and movement are very strong on the monitor. Haven't see the Dr yet today. The nurses are all really nice, so far. Which is good cause I'm kind of a demanding bitch especially when stuck in a bed. They are earning their paychecks this week! HA!

Update on Aaron: It's not official, but Aaron's unit is trying to approve for him to stay here for an "open window" meaning that he can stay until I am well and able to care for myself. He seemed confident that they would approve it. Maybe this is a blessing is disguise since elections are about to start over there. Hannah is keeping her Daddy safe! You never know...God works in mysterious ways... So, anyway Aaron should be home by this weekend. I am happy to see him but it's hard to be excited due to the circumstances.

I'll keep you posted as things progress.

Scary turn of events

So remember how I said that I have 10 weeks left of my pregnancy? Well, not anymore. At the most it will be 4.

After work yesterday I was walking back from the mailbox and my water broke. My friend Jenn took me to Evans Army Hospital and they did some tests and confirmed that it was my water and since I am not full-term I had to be sent to Memorial Hospital where they have a NICU. I was given two steroid shots for Hannah's lungs, and I have 24 more hours til they take effect. The doctor said that after that point if I start contracting (I haven't yet) they will not stop my labor because with no fluid in there, there is a big risk of infection. I have been pumped with all sorts of antibiotics. If she doesn't come on her own by 34 weeks they will induce.

I sent a Red Cross message to Aaron and he is talking to the commander about him coming home and possibly extending his R&R past two weeks.

Please pray for my family, I need a healthy baby girl and I so desperately need my husband here at this time.

And the countdown begins...

I have reached 30 weeks of my pregnancy! That means only 10 more weeks to go. So instead of counting up like I have been doing I am now going to start counting down. And if I think of it in terms of how much time is left 10 weeks isn't long. It has only been 10 weeks since I found out that I'm having a girl, and that time has flown by! It's a little scary to think of actually. I still have quite a bit I need to do, but it is all mostly small stuff. I still have at least one baby shower left, so hopefully I will get some of the things that I still need! And in case any of you are feeling generous I am registered at Target and Babies R Us ; )

He <3's me!!!

So today (day number 12) Aaron finally called! I was actually rather surprised to hear from him because I found out yesterday afternoon that the six day mission had been changed to 18 friggin days! Which would make a grand total of 21 days without talking to him since he called a few days before they left. One of Aaron's soldiers just got home for R&R and his wife was kind enough to text me to fill me in on that since I was clearly anxious about him calling. You can imagine how bummed I was to think of having to go another 10 days without talking to him. And you can also imagine how ecstatic I was when he called me today! I don't know how he got to call, nor did I ask (there's no point really since he can't give me details anyway), but I do know that hearing his voice for 30 minutes totally made my day, and was the perfect start to my week!

Six months down...

Six months to go! We have finally reached the deployment hump! It's all down hill from here. AND he should be home for R&R in about 10 weeks! I really think the rest of the time is going to fly by. This first six months have gone by pretty fast and I think with all of the things that will be going on in the last part it will go by even faster!

I still haven't heard from him though...11 days! OMG! This really sucks and right now I am hating the army for not allowing me to talk to my husband. I was hoping that he would be able to call today, but it's looking slim because he usually calls by 1000.


Okay everyone, have a happy weekend!!!!

WTF

So remember the blog that I wrote about USAA? Well someone left me this response:

Tricia Phillip, USAA Social Media said...
Hi-USAA here. It sounds like it was pretty frustrating to find out you'd have to pay $255 for a new windshield. Unfortunately because insurance is regulated by each state certain coverages may change when you move. On behalf of our members, especially the military and their families, USAA has been a longtime advocate of the optional federal charter concept. Should Congress pass legislation in support of an optional federal charter, we believe customers would have access to better, more uniform products and services at lower prices. If you’d like to get a quote for lowering your deductible for any future incidents, you can do so on usaa.com or call us at 1.800.531.8722. Before making a change, though, you may want to ask one of our advisors if the increase in premium that results from a lower deductible is in your financial best interest.

Okay, really??? Does someone at that company just sit around and google things about USAA in case someone is bad mouthing them? I found this to be really odd, and kinda creepy!

If it's not one thing...

...it's another!

So my other little pug, Eddy, got his tooth knocked out! He has an under bite and his bottom teeth stick out, and it's the one right in the middle. So he looks like a redneck! I actually found the tooth and called the vet, but I guess that don't put animal teeth back in like they do human ones. I'm not exactly sure how it got knocked out, but I found it by the fence in our back yard. The neighbor's big-ass German Shepard and him constantly bark at each other through the fence. And that big mother-fucker is so heavy that when he jumps against the fence he knocks the boards loose. I think one of them must've hit Eddy in the face and knocked out his little tooth. Poor pug!

AND it has been nine days since I talked to my husband. This is the longest we have ever gone without communication, and I'm not too happy about it. He told me that they were gong on a long mission, so at least I was prepared not to hear from him, but that doesn't mean that I have to like it! Last time he was deployed we talked almost every day, and this time I'm lucky if he calls twice a week. This deployment sucks and I am ready for it to be over!

You suck, USAA!

I want someone to please explain to me how my husband's truck got a huge two foot crack in the windshield while sitting in our driveway for two months!

Sunday, I decided to drive his truck to Lowe's since I haven't driven it in quite some time and I get in and there is a huge crack on the passenger side. I have no idea how it got there, because it certainly wasn't there the last time I drove it. So I thought okay, whatever I'll call the insurance company Monday and they'll pay to have it replaced. Boy, was I WRONG! I guess Colorado insurance policies don't cover glass 100% like they do in Kentucky and New York, where we grew up...naturally thinking it was like that every where. To go through the person who they recommend it will cost $255 to have the damned thing fixed. It will all be out of pocket because it's lower than our deductible, which is $500. And, if it gets broken again, like next week, we will have to pay for it all over again. So, what is the point of having insurance if they won't pay to fix things that are broken. Had I known that glass wasn't covered I would've had my insurance set up differently. This totally sucks! And, of course, things like this only happen when Aaron is gone, because I don't already have enough things to do as it is!

I am NOT currently accepting applications for new friends...

Before you think, this girl is a bitch! Let me explain myself...

I do have lots of friends, probably more than I have ever had, spread far and wide across the United States, and even a few overseas. And I LOVE my friends! I make friends where ever I go. But when I meet someone new, and they know things about me that I obviously didn't tell them, it creeps me out. I guess we can thank Facebook and Myspace for that, but that's why my pages are set to private! So, how this person gained access to my page I will never know, but she knew I had been on a cruise and that I am pregnant with a girl....And her attitude about the whole thing was just weird...every other thing I said she would reply, "I know, I saw it on your page." So why is it that you're spending so much time on my page looking at my pictures??? You have kids, and your husband is deployed....I would think that you wouldn't have enough extra time on your hands to sit and study someone else's page. And by knowing all of this, did you think I would be impressed?? Well, I am not, I am just plain creeped out. So get a life and go do some housework or something. I didn't ask you to be my friend, so I don't really want you to think you are in fact my friend just because you think you know everything about me. I am good on friends right now, thanks.

Why do I torture myself?

So, remember how I said that hanging blinds is a BITCH. Well, guess what, that status hasn't changed.

I got my electric bill Saturday....$205.36! Now, you might be wondering what my electric bill and window blinds have in common...let me tell you. The blinds in my bedroom broke a few months ago. My bedroom is on the east facing side of the house, where the sun rises, therefore my room gets very hot and uncomfortable in the morning when I am sleeping. So what do I do...go downstairs and turn the A/C down. I thought it might be a good idea to hang some blinds to prevent the sun from shining in so brightly, and hopefully reduce my energy cost. I went to Lowe's and bought some faux wood ones (they look just as nice but aren't as expensive!) and attempted to hang them. It's not really difficult, but it IS a pain in the ass! Hopefully I don't have to hang any more any time soon, cause it's just one of those things that I would rather Aaron did! HA!

But, they do look nice, and I didn't get hot this morning. So I guess they are serving their purpose.

Victory!

I have, once again, learned something new in Aaron's absence.

My neighbor, Sam's husband is deployed as well. We spend a lot of time together eating dinner and hanging out so we have become really good friends. Anyway, she comes and rings my doorbell (remember the one I fixed lol) and says she can't start her car...luckily it was parked in her driveway and not the garage! Anyway, I was like, do you have jumper cables??? She did. So I hop in my car and pull it over into her yard. We read the instructions and made a call to my father-in-law, just to make sure we were doing it right before we started the cars. Voila! IT STARTED! Piece of cake! I swear, the things I have learned to do for myself since Aaron left. I amaze myself sometimes!!!

At last!

I have reached my third (and final) trimester! I am officially 7 months pregnant.....only 80something days to go! I can hardly believe it. The time has just flown by, and I am hoping the last three months do as well too. Her room is 98% done and I could have a small children's store in her closet, with all of the clothes that it contains. 12 weeks to go, and counting...

So, as many of you can guess there are several reason why being pregnant while my husband is deployed sucks. Such as, no one to rub my feet and back, no one to go to the store at midnight because I drink milk like it's going to expire tomorrow, and want it right now, and as I have mentioned , having to do his normal household duties, and of course no sex when I have raging hormones!. But there are reasons that it doesn't suck.

1. Hair grows faster and thicker (and sometimes darker) while pregnant. No one sees my naked body but me, so I can deal with it for a few days longer than if he were here having to look at his hairy wife. I would constantly being shaving/tweezing/waxing something in fear of frightening him when we go to bed.

2. My body temperature is slightly higher, so I can crank up the A/C and don't have to listen to him complain about it...and I don't have to lay next to another body in bed, making it that much hotter.

3. I can sleep in whatever position is most comfortable for my bulging belly and take up the whole bed.

4. I can eat whatever, and whenever I want without having to worry about cooking for someone else. Or the fact that I have eatten the same thing for four days in a row because that's what I'm craving...and I don't have to care that he doesn't like it.

5. I have mood-swings and am cranky and irritable. The silliest things piss me off, so by the time he calls I have (usually) cooled off and we don't argue.

Honestly I would rather have him here, but sometimes it nice to do whatever I want whenever I want, because right now I'm pretty focused on myself, not gonna lie! I am growing a human, I think I am entitled to be a little selfish!

It's a small world.

So I encountered the strangest coincidence Friday night while out to dinner with Sam. We went to this little Japanese restaurant to eat. I have never been to it before, but it's one of her fav's so I thought I would try it. It really was good! Anyway, so we sit down at our "table" which is one of those where the chef cooks your meal in front of you so you are sitting with other people you don't know as well. We were talking about her brother-in-law and how he is in Aaron's unit and they don't know each other,etc. And she said, "Yeah I asked him if he knew Billings." Well, the guy sitting next to me interrupted and asked if she had said her name was Billings, and I replied that no, it was my name. So then he asks if I am Aaron's wife. I was like WTF?! Who are you??

It turns out that he is in Aaron's unit and was home for R&R. But I mean, what a small world..of all people to sit next to at that particular moment. I find things like that fascinating. Anyway, I just thought I would share because I thought it was cool.

I mean really...

This is exactly why I do not associate with the FRG; yesterday we received an email that there is an urgent meeting today, and they would like for everyone to attend. The meeting is at 1830 in the FRC building. That's all it said. Okay, what the fuck is the FRC building, and where is hell is it?

So I emailed the FRG leader back and asked her for the location. She said, "The easiest way for me to tell you is that it's by the houseing (that's how she spelled it) meeting."

Um, okay so that tells me NOTHING. Could I have an address or a building number or even a land mark nearby? Also, I don't live on post, so how would I know where anything pertaining to housing is? Seriously, how can you be the leader of anything when you can't even give more than 24 hour notice to an 'urgent' meeting and specific directions!? Her communication skills suck and I intend on letting someone know that in the future it would be helpful if someone with a little more intelligence was the one to give out important information.

So if any of you are familiar with Fort Carson, and could help me with this matter I would greatly appreciate it.

Amazing!

Yesterday I had a 3D/4D ultrasound done! It was so amazing to see my little princess and see her move around and all of her facial features! I think she looks so much like Aaron, especially to see his baby pictures from a few days old. But, for most of it she had her legs in front of her face playing with her toes, lol. We got a few good pictures, but I wanted to have a video made to send to Aaron, and for most of it you couldn't see much. The lady said I could come back on Saturday to have another one done for free since Hannah didn't want to cooperate lol.

It has finally happened.

I weigh over 180 lbs. I am a tall gal, 5'10", with kinda large ASSets. So it's not really a surprise that I have reached this terrible number on the scale....but I hoped it would be a little later in my pregnancy. Like maybe the last week. The doctor has reassured me that my weight is normal and nothing to be concerned about, especially since it's summer and I am probably retaining water. Yay. That makes me want to sit here and cry (while I eat my brownie).

I'm not trying to toot my own horn...

Okay, actually, yes I am!

In the five and a half months since my husband has been gone there are several of his normal household duties that I have had to take responsibility for. Here is the list of things that I have done with little or no help.

1. Successfully turn on sprinkler system (for more on this, please refer to this blog.)

2. Mow the grass bi-weekly.

3. Install new front porch light fixture (without electrocuting myself or catching anything on fire, might I add).

4. Remember to take vehicles in for regular maintenance.

5. Take the trash out to the curb every Tuesday night.

6. Paint baby Hannah's room. (And for all of you who want to throw your 2 cents in, my doctor said it was fine as long as I wasn't working with lead-based paint)

7. Learn how to operate the grill.

8. Put up the crib.

9. Put up new blinds in the baby's room (FYI, it was a BITCH) and hang curtains.

10. Empty large, heavy bag of dog food into container where we store it.

11. Refill water softener with salt pellets.

None of this may seem too terribly difficult to anyone else, but these are all the things that he would normally do, and I wouldn't have to lift my pretty little finger to help. So, I have managed to keep up with my normal duties, and now his as well. It defiantly keeps me busy when I'm not at my 40-hour-a-week-job. And I just wanted to say that I am proud of myself for doing it all, while being pregnant! I am also proud of the other military wives who manage to hold down the fort while their spouses are gone. Whether it be for a week, or a year and a half, kudos to you too for getting it all done and not running home to your Mommy!

Boredom at it's best

I stumbled across the website called yearbookyourself.com, and I decided to have a little fun at my dear husband's expense!

1950

...these are similar to basic training glasses...

1952

1962

1964
...I love this bow tie...


1966


1968

...I think he has the same hair stylist as Chewbacca...

1970

...there's nothing like a man wearing a satin shirt...

1972 1974
1978
...same hairstyle his mom probably had that year...


1980

...I love Brillo pads...

1984
1986
1988
...you know mullets are SEXY...

1994

...I never dated a BROTHA...

2000

Thank you, Aaron, for helping me pass the time today at Front Range Orthopaedics.

I need....

someone to tell me where I can have an ACU diaper bag made??


AND some chocolate. Haha!

snail mail

So, remember how I said that sending care packages to my hubby overseas was one of my favorite wifely duties? It still is. But it is a lot less joyful when he doesn't receive the packages. Such as his Father's Day gift that I sent in plenty of time for him to get it by Father's Day....he still hasn't gotten it! That's not the only one that he hasn't gotten, but it's the most delayed.

There was a meeting with the battalion commander on Monday (he is home on leave). He generally went over what's happened so far, what's going on now, and what to expect closer to them returning. Then he opened the floor for questions and/or comments. So, I told me about the predicament with Aaron not getting his mail in over a month. He said he would look into it and email me, and that he hasn't heard of any complaints of people not getting mail. Maybe it's just cause I seem to have luck like that.

So, now that it's been brought to someones attention, maybe something will get done and he will finally get his mail...one could only hope anyway....

Counting down the days

So, in less than 100 days I will be a mommy! I have 14 weeks left of my pregnancy. It is going by so fast! But that really helps the deployment to go by fast too.

Speaking of the deployment, we are now five months in! I think the rest will fly by. I am planning on quitting work September 25th. And I still have lots to do to prepare for baby Hannah. Of course Aaron will be home for two weeks in October and then I'll have the baby to take care of for the last portion.

I still can't believe how fast time goes. I am so nervous and excited about having my baby girl! It almost seems unreal.

JINX!

I do not think I am the luckiest person in the world.

Monday I was talking with one of my friends who had gotten a jury summons for the fourth time. I told her that I had never had one, ever. And we were laughing and joking about it and I told her about Aaron getting one to appear on his birthday of all days! And I said something along the lines of, watch I'll go home and have one of those little papers sitting in my mail box. Well, I didn't. BUT...Wednesday I checked my mail, and guess what?? There it sat. Those people in the court system must have some awful powerful hearing, because I swear they over heard me and put one in the mail that same day. So, anyway I have a jury summons for August 10th. Yay (please note the sarcasm here). I totally jinxed myself!

I'm really not so pissed about getting the summons, but don't you have to be a registered voter to receive one? Well, I know for a fact that I registered to vote when I got my driver's license right after we moved here. So I tried to vote in the presidential election last November and was told that I was not registered, and that it was past the deadline to do so. But now this thing popped up in my mailbox so I'm a little peeved that I did not get to vote and yet still have to serve jury duty.

Over the hump

So today marks five months since my hubby left for Iraq (which then turned into Afghanistan). We aren't over the deployment hump, but we have made it over the hump to R&R! Woot woot! Approx 97 days til I get to see his face!

Yesterday I had my 24 week ob/gyn appointment. Things are looking "fabulous" according to my doctor. Blood pressure is great, fundal height is right where it should be, I gained eight pounds since my last appointment (I don't know if I really feel great about this, but she did), and the baby's heartbeat is 152. And the reports from the extra ultrasound that was preformed came back. That extra tissue is scar tissue from the D&C I had with my miscarriage, and they got clear pictures of Hannah's spine. Everything looks normal. So I can stop worrying (for now). Four weeks til my next appointment then I start going in every two! I can't believe I'm nearing my last trimester! Ahhh! Time is really going fast.

kids (part 2)

Hahahahaha! This little girl is too funny!

kick my ass

Bad day

So my husband called me from Afghanistan today and told me that their vehicle had been hit by an IED. A few guys were hurt but no one was killed, thank God! He didn't go into much detail about it, so that's basically all that I know. I'm just glad that everyone is pretty much okay, and that their injuries will heal and nothing is permanent.

But I was obviously upset by this. It's scary, and I think until it happens to your loved one or someone you know, the whole situation isn't that real. So I was crying after we got off of the phone. My boss asked me what was wrong and I told her. She tried to comfort me a little, but wanted to know if I would be able to finish the day at work. Um, yeah I can but that doesn't mean that I want to sit at my desk all day and pretend to be happy and listen to patients problems when they call. I have my own stress to deal with.

Did she offer to let me go home? No. That's fine, because I can handle it. What pisses me off about it is this other girl I work with. First of all she one of the laziest people I know and will find any way to get out of her work. Basically she is a piece of shit. Two weeks ago someone at work "hurt her feelings" so she left early and even took the next day off! So why is it that she can whine and get special treatment, but I have a legitimate reason to be upset and don't get shit?! It's fucked up.

Day 2

of MJ! AHHHHHHHH! Please turn it off!

The lady I sit next to at work listened to stuff about MJ for eight hours yesterday! And now today she is listening to it again. Oh.My.God. Get a life!

I do feel really bad for his family, but honestly I think there are many people who parish every day that don't get the recognition that they deserve. He's being treated as if he's the president of the United States! Furthermore, I don't feel like it's much of a tragedy because he died from abusing a medication used during surgery. So it's kinda his own fault. Seven American soldiers were killed in Afghanistan Monday and their names weren't even mentioned in the media. They died for our freedom, what did Michael do? I think our country's priorities are seriously not in order!